I read to the bottom, but you know who didn't? Like 90% of the girls out there. Ever heard of TL;DR? Also, as is my gripe with most of these profiles. I don't know anything about you. Your profile is your chance to show your true self. I see you are truly sarcastic and long-winded, but that's about it.
Sorry for the delay. Life got a little crazy and I stepped back from the online dating world for a bit. But now I'm back and I have lots of great stuff for you so have no fear! Read on, daters!